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Capulet: Welcome everyone, to our thirtieth annual Halloween party! There’ll be fun, excitement, and so much more this evening. Don’t forget, voting for best costume ends at precisely midnight, on the dot! If you have any questions, just ask the workers, they’ll know everything. Have fun!

[Music plays, guests scatter]

Romeo (stops a worker): Hey, man! Who’s the hottie at ten o’clock over there?

Worker: How should I know? I don’t get paid enough to remember all of these rich folks’ names.

Romeo: But doesn’t she just turn you on, man? You have to admit, she is on fine lady… Oh, God, I’ve never seen anyone so attractive! I wonder… See you later, dude, I’m goin’ in for the kill!

Tybalt: Wait a minute, that voice… It can’t be… a Montague? In the Capulet house?! It has to be! Oh, so help me God, if I see him again, he better know what color he prefers for his casket…

Capulet: Why would you do anything of the sort, Tybalt?

Tybalt: It’s a Montague, Uncle! They’re nothing but lying, deceitful criminals!

Capulet: It looks to be young Romeo; let it be. He’s not doing any harm, and the only one who’s got any problem with it is you. And so help me God if you try anything and ruin this party simply because of him.

Tybalt: Fine, whatever. But I’ve got my eye on him…

[Romeo finally makes his way to Juliet]

Romeo: Hey! Are you from Nashville? ‘Cause you’re the only ‘ten’ I see!

Juliet: Maybe, but are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got ‘fine’ written all over you…

Romeo: Well if that’s the case, I’m also a doctor, sent to check on you after your long fall from heaven.

Juliet: Then maybe you ought to check my pulse, doctor.

Romeo: And you should check mine.

[They kiss.]

Juliet: Hm, that’s odd, I couldn’t find it!

Romeo: Yeah, me neither, what a crazy coincidence!

[They kiss longer.]

Juliet: You kiss well…

Guest: Juliet! Your mother has been looking all over for you!

Juliet: Oh? Gotta run, sorry!

Romeo: Who is her mother?

Guest: Oh, you must not be from around here! Her mother is one of the hosts, a longtime friend of mine; I helped her raise Juliet.

Romeo: Wait, hold up; she’s a Capulet?

Benvolio: Romeo, dude, let’s get out of here. All The fun’s done.

Capulet: Wait, don’t be in a hurry! There’s still much more fun to come!

[Everyone but Juliet and Guest exits.]

Juliet: Wait, what was that boy’s name? The one leaving just now? Is he married?

Guest: That boy is Romeo— Romeo Montague; the only son of your family’s only enemy.

Juliet: What? This can’t be true… How is my only love my only hate?

Guest: We’ll talk later. Let’s go, though, everyone else is gone.